We always get asked if we want a boy or a girl throughout the pregnancy, and the response is usually, "Oh, I don't care. I only wish to have a healthy baby." Even if you secretly want a pink nursery, you realize how true it is at that split second after birth as you wait to hear him cry. People will continue to inquire about your desires as your children get older. What school do you want them to attend? What type of individuals do you want them to be? You'll have fantasies about prosperous professions and beautiful relationships, just as you did about princess décor.
However, people do not think about happiness enough these days when it comes to children. They occupy their minds with their chances of getting success. They make comparisons with other children of their age. They think of anniversaries, graduations, and gleaming prizes. We need to think more about what a child requires from a parent to be happy. How do we focus on happiness when our hands are always full?
We can begin by taking a deep breath and then focus on the list of these seven secrets to raising a happy child.
You've undoubtedly heard a thousand times that happy parents equal happy children. "Nobody's happy until Mama's happy." All of this is to argue that the best reason to make yourself happy is that you can better care for your children.
The most vital of things that you can do for your child's mental well-being is to take care of yourself: schedule time for rest, relaxation, and, perhaps most importantly, take time out for romance. Maintain a healthy and happy marriage relationship with your spouse. "When parents have a very excellent connection," says Bob Murray, Ph.D. (Clinical Psychologist and author of the book, Creating Optimism), "the child's happiness frequently follows naturally."
OK, sure. Another reason is that children follow what you do rather than say. You discovered this the first time she spoke a curse word during a heated game.
Showing your children what a happy person looks like is the best approach to educate them on how to be satisfied. Set a good example of self-care and self-love. Allow kids to grow up hearing Mom say lovely things about herself and investing in activities she enjoys. The chances are that your children will be more inclined to do the same.
No average, healthy person is always in a joyful mood. It is pretty natural to have bad days. Anger, grief, and even anguish are necessary components of the human experience. The more at ease your children are with "bad" emotions, the more they will be able to feel positive emotions like pleasure and love.
When children are angry, they shout. When they are sad, they cry. They may stamp their feet and run about in circles when they don't know what to feel. And, if you're lucky, they'll do it all in the middle of aisle nine at your friendly neighborhood Target store. The key here is to allow them. Children must communicate their feelings. Adults know when and how to contact a buddy to complain when things are bad, but children are a little more primal.
Shushing and publicly humiliating them is ineffective and only arouses more anger or anguish and feelings of embarrassment. Allow them to vent in their way before offering to assist. Enduring a public temper tantrum may feel overwhelming at the time. Still, it is preferable to a lifetime of internalizing bad feelings, leading to emotional difficulties for your child.
However, it is easier said than done. It is hard for many parents to see their children suffer, and telling yourself that it's healthy for them doesn't make it any easier. Empathy is beneficial. Tell your little ones that you understand how they feel. When they're down, wrap your arms around them and allow yourself to cry a few tears as well.
It has been observed that the affluent people's children are unhappy because their parents don't love them enough to spend time with them.
Even toddlers can detect when their parents are shutting them out or responding automatically. Kids feel more connected when they believe their parents actually listen to them (anything from a fight in school, their favorite teacher to what they like at their friend's birthday party). This boosts their self-esteem and makes them happier overall. Pay attention when your children speak. It's the most effective approach to establishing an open and honest relationship with your child, making your child feel heard and happy.
When children understand that their parents love and support them unconditionally, they are more inclined to take healthy risks. They are secure and confident in their judgments. They learn that while individuals make errors, there is always the opportunity to remedy a wrong. Children are content when they know that their parents will always be there for them, for better or worse.
Encourage their children to be who they are; for example, one of your children could be a self-proclaimed atheist with different political views. At the same time, the other will be much more spiritual. Many of their peculiarities and hobbies are strange to both yourself and your partner, and it's difficult not to wonder where they came from. But we urge you to let the kids fly their unique flags, absolutely accepting them so they may learn to embrace themselves.
Acceptance of self is one of the hardest lessons we all learn later in life. It is better to sow the seeds of self-love and self-acceptance right from the beginning.
Your children will have to face plenty of rejection in the real world as grown-ups. If you want them to be happy, let them get used to hearing no while they are still secure at home with people who care about them. If you discover your toddler tearing apart lovely peonies or tugging the tail of a family pet, remind them that plants and animals are also living beings. Hurting the flower (or pet) harms their growth and hurts their feelings. This fosters empathy and knowledge of the experiences of other living creatures in your child. Give the children responsibility for learning that plants, like nature, should be handled with care.
Teach your children to say these two magic words, "thank you" and "please," as they are more than just good manners. According to research, individuals who practice thankfulness daily are twenty-five percent happier than the rest.
We may not be sure how thankfulness is measured in percentages, but we do know that being conscious of what's lovely in your life feels good. It is common knowledge that most individuals forget to be appreciative of the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Making a habit of thinking about what you're grateful for might help you deal with the stresses of everyday life.
You might urge your child to keep a thankfulness diary or incorporate it into your mealtime ritual. (Alternatively, you may do what I did and buy the journal and then fall back on the dinner routine if the journal is misplaced.)
One of the most important lessons you will learn as a parent is that perfection is unachievable. No matter how good parents you are, your children will leave their childhood with some scars and emotional disorders.
That's OK.
Therapy is not at all a bad experience. At the very least, your kids will have something to talk about when they start. So do not give up hope and take whatever is useful to raise a happy child.
Conclusion
Don't we all want the best for our children? We want children to learn how to love and be loved in return, pursue their aspirations, and achieve success. Most importantly, we want them to be happy. If it all was to be true, what an ideal and perfect world would make? However, in real life, things can get uglier and more difficult not only for the adults but more so for our children. How much influence do we have over our children's happiness? What can you do to make your house comfortable for your child? To answer all your questions, ParentalMastery.com has compiled a list of seven secrets to raising a happy child.
These secrets can help you connect with your child and raise them to be happy and lovely people.
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